Denial

Today is a bad day. I got a phone call from the secretary at my pain doctor's office. The insurance has denied my request for inpatient ketamine for Monday or in general. My doctor is fighting hard to try to appeal it but the secretary does not seem to optimistic. I'm still having my injection on Friday. The MRI didn't show anything. My iron levels are border line low, and i cannot take regular iron pills as they make me sick. It's most likely because i dont eat much and when i do, i don't eat much meat or leafy greens. Eating is just too painful for me. I've lost a lot of weight.

I'm probably going to have to quit my summer internship. This is really upsetting to me. I was looking forward to learning a lot and having a good time and having something to put on my resume. I cant really leave the house now except for doctors. I'm trying to figure out how to do normal things like shower because i can't stand for more than a couple of minutes without extreme pain. To make things worse the water of the shower coming down makes the pain worse due to the sensitivity to touch.

Looking forward to the ketamine treatment was something that was giving me hope. Now i don't know what to do. I don't want to give myself too much hope that the doctor will be able to appeal it becuase i know hes a great doctor and he will do everything possible, but the insurance company is stubborn. I don't want to set myself up for disapointment again.